How Do Deal With Losing

Losing Isn’t Optional — It’s Part of the Game

At the highest levels of tennis, everyone loses. Often. Even legends. Roger Federer, across his storied career, won only 54% of total points. That means he was “failing” on nearly half the balls he hit — and he’s one of the greatest to ever do it.

So the question for competitive players isn’t how to avoid losing — it’s: How do you respond when you do?

What Pros Know That Many Players Don’t

1. Losing Doesn’t Mean You’re Broken

Michael Kosta — once ranked 864 in the world before becoming a comedian — put it best in his book Lucky Loser:

“I wasn’t some mediocre player learning to cope. I was a winner, and then suddenly I wasn’t. That transition? Brutal.”

The pros understand that losing doesn’t mean your game is worthless. It means you’re competing at a level where every point is a battle — and sometimes, the other guy just plays better.

2. Process Beats Postmortem

What separates the better players isn’t how deeply they analyze every loss — it’s how effectively they move on.

• Novak Djokovic? He journals his thoughts post-match, then resets by the next practice session.

• Rafael Nadal? He spoke bluntly about his performance, but never wallows.

• Serena Williams? Known for saying: “I’m not going to beat myself up. I’ll be better tomorrow.”

They all follow the same principle: Short memory. Clear process. Keep moving.

Tactical Tools the Pros Use to Reset

• Post-loss practice: Many pros schedule a light session within hours of a loss — not punishment, but emotional recalibration.

• Lessons journals: Some players note one or two takeaways from a match — and then close the book. Literally.

• Physical movement: Even a short run or hitting session can disrupt negative self-talk and re-engage the body with rhythm and flow.

• Self-belief recall: The best actively remind themselves of past wins and tough matches survived. This fuels confidence for the next challenge.

And most importantly — they don’t obsess over how others are doing.

“Comparison is the thief of joy” — a truth every UTR stressing player must internalize.
Constantly measuring yourself against peers or rankings only distracts you from the real task: your own progress.

Performance Psychology: Reframing the Loss

At the heart of how pros handle defeat is performance psychology — the science of staying mentally agile under pressure. Elite players train their minds like their bodies: building routines, regulating emotions, and mastering recovery. Whether it’s breathing techniques, self-talk, or visualization, the goal is the same — to shift focus from outcome to process, from panic to poise. The best don’t avoid nerves or frustration — they manage them. And that’s a skill every competitive player can learn.

Wrap

Pros can’t avoid losing — they master the art of recovery.  They don’t see defeat as a dead-end. They see it as a brief detour that sharpens their edge.

So next time you lose? Don’t spiral. Reboot. Reflect. Get back on the court!

The Power of Belief: Alcaraz

Carlos Alcaraz didn’t blow Lorenzo Musetti off the court in their French Open semifinal.  And he didn’t out-hit Jannik Sinner in the final either.

Sinner owned the short points, especially early. Through the first set and into the second, he led 32–14 in rallies of four shots or fewer—stretching that edge to 38–14. Even as Alcaraz mounted his comeback, Sinner controlled the quick exchanges, ultimately finishing with a 108–95 advantage in short points.

But Alcaraz didn’t need to dominate the stats.  What he showed instead was the most undervalued skill in high-performance tennis: belief.  Belief when you’re down two sets.  Belief when your rival holds match points.  Belief that your preparation and patterns will carry you—because they’ve been battle-tested when no one was watching.

1. Belief Replaces Panic

Let’s talk more data. Against Musetti, Alcaraz landed just 41% of first serves in the opening set—a red flag for any aggressive baseliner. But instead of forcing, he recalibrated. Upped his percentage to 65% in set two. Took control.

Against Sinner? He faced the abyss—down 3–5, love-40 in the fourth set, with Sinner serving for the title.  Three match points. Gone.  Alcaraz didn’t flinch. He played ball by ball, not scoreboard by scoreboard. A flicked backhand winner. A passing shot on the run. A 13-of-14 point surge.

Champions don’t panic—they adapt.  And belief is what buys you time to adapt under fire.

2. Strategic Belief Beats Emotional Tennis

There’s a rule I teach often:  If you lose the first set, get to 4–4 in the second.  Not 6–4. Not a miracle tiebreak. Just 4–4. That’s the inflection point. That’s where pressure flips.

Alcaraz lives this. In both the semifinal and final, he transformed pressure into performance—not through emotion, but through execution.  He didn’t play heroic tennis. He played pressure-conditioned tennis—ritual-driven, pattern-disciplined, anchored by belief.

3. Why We Train Tiebreakers

There’s a reason why our training sessions lean heavily on tiebreak scenarios—because tiebreaks are turning points.  In the second-set breaker against Musetti, Alcaraz played with surgical calm.
In the fourth-set breaker against Sinner, he trailed 0–2 and won seven of the next eight points.

From 0–40 down to a 7–3 breaker win—those moments weren’t just about strokes. They were surges, fueled by belief.  And once he seized that momentum, the match shifted from battle to procession.

4. Train Your Belief Like You Train Your Backhand

Belief doesn’t just show up. You build it. Like footwork. Like VO2 max. Like your first step.  Try this:

• Start practice sets down a break

• Play tiebreaks only after tough intervals or with heavy legs

• Use your rituals—breath, bounce, cue word. Lock it in.

If you can’t hold belief in practice,  You won’t hold it at 4–5, 30–40, second serve. And definitely not at 4-6 down in a tie breaker.   Simple as that.

Belief Is the Edge

Belief is not a feel-good accessory.  It’s your edge.  Your answer when your serve deserts you.  Your fuel when fatigue tightens your chest. Your weapon when the opponent thinks it’s over.

You earn it in the shadows—When no one’s watching, When you’re losing in practice sets, When no one believes but you.

When Belief Ages With You

But what about you—the aging player who’s no longer 22, who feels the whisper of doubt more than the roar of confidence?  That’s where belief shifts. It’s not loud anymore. It’s quieter. More deliberate.

You don’t just doubt the score—you start to doubt your body.  Will it move when you ask? Will the legs hold up? At that point, belief becomes memory.

You remind yourself: I’ve been here before. You trust the odds—not because they promise victory, but because they’ve favored you more often than not.  And yes, probability teaches that sometimes you’ll come up short. But that’s not failure. That’s just reality.

You swing anyway—because belief, even in its mature form, still gives you your best chance to win.

Wrap: Belief Is Bigger Than Tennis

Alcaraz didn’t win because he was perfect. He won because when perfection failed, belief didn’t.

Next time you’re down—on court or off—don’t flinch.  Reset. Breathe. Play one more point.

Because belief, trained and tested, Beats talent that doubts itself every time.

The Hardest Truth in Tennis: Understanding Probability in Tennis

Not every match goes your way—and sometimes, that’s not your fault.

You may show up with your best preparation, execute the right tactics, manage your emotions, and still walk off the court with a loss. It’s one of the hardest truths in tennis: doing everything right doesn’t guarantee the result you want on that day.

That’s where the role of probability comes in.

Tennis Is a Game of Margins—and Matchups

Unlike games of pure skill or strength, tennis is deeply influenced by matchups. Styles clash. Surfaces shift dynamics. Even the day’s conditions can tilt the court.

You might play smart—high-percentage targets, solid footwork, good energy—but face a player whose weapons slice through your patterns. That doesn’t mean your plan failed. It means on this day, against this player, the numbers didn’t line up.

And that’s okay.

The Breakthrough I’ll Never Forget

Growing up, I was able to dominate most players across Sydney—except for one guy. My nemesis.  I lost to him six straight times. Every match, same story: he was just cleaner, just sharper, always a step ahead. But   on the seventh try, something shifted.  We met in the semifinals. He rolled me in the first set, like usual. I dug deep, scrapped my way to win the second, barely hanging on. Then—out of nowhere—he retired. And he wasn’t hurt, well physically anyway. What?  I never lost a set to him again.

That day didn’t just mark a breakthrough—it showed me how persistence and process eventually turn the tide. Even when the odds have been stacked against you.

The Bigger Victory

Tennis demands more than just talent—it demands consistency under pressure and belief in yourself.  You may lose matches even where you do the right things, but if you keep showing up and sticking to the process, you’re stacking probability in your favor.

And when that tipping point comes—it changes everything.

Do the right things often enough, and probability eventually bends your way.

Tennis Is a Mind Game — Just Ask Alcaraz

When the fiercest battle isn’t across the net — it’s inside your own head.

Don’t You Just Love Alcaraz?

He’s not just a phenomenal athlete — he’s a true role model.

Alcaraz plays with his heart on his sleeve, fearless in both his shot selection and his emotions. But what makes him even more special? He lets us inside his mind.

That honesty teaches us something deeper than strategy or technique — it reminds us who the toughest opponent really is:  Ourselves.

“Today I fought against myself, the mind… I was mad, angry with myself, talking not really good things. Just really happy that I didn’t let those thoughts play against me. I just tried to calm myself in those moments I was down and I managed to get going.”
— Carlos Alcaraz

That wasn’t just a quote. It was a confession — a raw moment of truth after a gritty battle with Ben Shelton. But it wasn’t Shelton who posed the greatest threat.

It was the storm within.

When the Mind Becomes the Opponent

In tennis, you stare down a blazing forehand, a lefty kicker that climbs above your shoulder, or a player charging in with fire. But the real war? It’s not always across the net.

Most times, it’s inside you.

Alcaraz — usually calm and fluid on court — showed us something every player can learn from: even the best can lose focus when frustration creeps in. Negative thoughts can throw off timing, shot choices, and rhythm. Learning to manage those moments is a big part of becoming a better player.

We’ve all been there:

• In a tiebreak.

• After a double fault.

• When your legs feel like anchors and your mind spirals.

Mental noise drowns tactical clarity.  Emotional chaos delays footwork instinct.  Self-criticism paralyzes shot selection.

Reclaiming Control

What Alcaraz managed — and what every serious player must learn — is how to pivot.  Not from tactics, but from toxic inner dialogue to calm, competitive resilience.

Here’s how to train for it:

• 4-7-8 breathing & rituals: Calm your nervous system between points.

• Positive self-talk scripts: Short, powerful phrases — “Reset.” “Let’s go.” “Come on.”

• Pattern interrupts: Use a bounce, string tap, or mantra to cut thought spirals.

• Visualize the challenge, not the outcome: Lock in on execution, not winning.

Why Shelton Brought Out the Best — and Worst

Shelton’s game — the big lefty serve, the relentless pressure, the on-court speed — forces you to stay composed under fire.

There’s no margin for emotional leaks. Every loose point is a crack.  Every moment of anger is momentum handed over. It’s not just a match — it’s a mental siege.

Shelton doesn’t just test your tennis.  He tests your temperament.

Final Takeaway

Your fiercest rival isn’t always across the net.  Sometimes, it’s the voice inside your own head.

Learn to compete with it — not against it — and you’ll start winning the matches that matter most.

And even then?  Some days you’ll lose that mental battle.

But if you’re willing to face that opponent again and again, like Alcaraz, you’re already winning more than you think.

The Fire Within: Courage as Defined by Kohli

Greg Chappell’s stirring tribute to Virat Kohli in the Sydney Morning Herald paints a portrait of a cricketer who redefined not just Indian cricket, but the very meaning of courage on a global stage.

In Snarling warrior Kohli was the face of a bold, brash new India, Chappell captures the essence of Kohli’s firebrand spirit and his relentless pursuit of excellence.

Inspired by Chappell’s reflections, this post explores how Kohli’s legacy offers a powerful lens through which we can understand courage—not as absence of fear, but as mastery over it.

Redemption as a Ritual

In 2014, England exposed him. Kohli failed, again and again. But what did he do?

He didn’t complain. He relearned. Obsessed over technique. Sought mentorship.

Four years later, at Edgbaston, he silenced ghosts with a masterclass in grit.

That’s courage—not in never falling, but in mastering the fall.

The Rewiring of Belief

Kohli didn’t just score runs. He didn’t merely win matches. He reshaped the very psyche of Indian cricket.

For decades, Indian teams touring abroad carried the weight of history and the shadow of hesitation. Success overseas was seen as a hope—something to be cherished if it came, but not expected.

Kohli dismantled that mindset. Under his leadership, India didn’t just aim to compete; they arrived expecting to win. That shift—from tentative aspiration to unapologetic ambition—was seismic.

He didn’t wait for the game to offer him respect. He took it. He authored a new script where aggression, preparation, and belief weren’t exceptions—they were the standard.

In doing so, he led one of the most courageous cultural revolutions in the history of Indian sport.

Courage’s Inner World

Courage is also internal.

Kohli practiced pressure. He visualized pain. He breathed through billions of expectations.

He faced the booing crowd—and defended even rivals like Steve Smith when it mattered.

This was not brashness. This was integrity under fire.

The Bigger Statement

His greatest innings weren’t just statistics. They were manifestos.

• Adelaide 2014: 141 while chasing the improbable

• Perth 2018: 123 on a devilish pitch

• Edgbaston 2018: 149—where he rewrote his own legacy

These weren’t innings. They were acts of will.

Key Takeaways

• Courage is choosing growth after public failure

• Courage is staying true to self, even when no one else understands

Kohli didn’t just play the game. He changed the conversation.

For every athlete, his story is a case study in courage—a reminder that the greatest battles often begin within.

Using All Your Senses: A Smarter Way to Improve Your Tennis

Most players try to improve their strokes by tweaking technique—but often overlook their best built-in tools: sight, sound, and feel. These three senses form a powerful feedback loop that helps you recognize what’s working and fix what isn’t—without needing a coach by your side every moment.

Even small improvements in how you use your senses can lead to noticeable results in timing, consistency, and shot confidence.

1. Sight: See the Ball Until the End

If there’s one habit to master, it’s watching the ball all the way into your strings. Studies and coaching experience show that more than 90% of errors happen because players don’t fully track the ball. Most look up too early—toward the target or their opponent—and lose focus at the moment of contact.

• Groundstrokes: Focus on the ball coming off your opponent’s racquet and follow it into your contact zone. Try to see it blur against your strings.

• Volleys: Keep your eyes on the ball, especially when at net—quick exchanges require sharp focus and short swings.

• Serves: Watch your toss until the moment you strike it. Don’t let your eyes chase the ball down the court before you’ve even hit it.

2. Sound: Let the Ball Tell You

Sound is an underused but powerful tool. A clean shot makes a sharp pop, while a mis-hit often sounds dull or off. The sound tells you if your timing and contact were solid—even before the ball lands.

• Forehand/Backhand: A satisfying “whack” tells you you’re hitting cleanly. If not, your timing might be off.

• Serve Returns: Listen to the sound of the serve—it gives you early clues about power and spin.

• Overheads and Smashes: A solid overhead sounds like a snap. If it feels weak, it probably sounded weak, too.

An easy mental cue: Watch the ball until you hear the sound of the hit. This delays your instinct to look up and keeps your head still through contact.

3. Feel: Learn What “Right” Feels Like

As you get more experience, your body starts to recognize the feeling of a good shot. This is muscle memory working for you. The goal is to develop a clear internal sense of what solid contact feels like—so you can adjust without overthinking.

• Serve: A smooth, low-vibration hit usually means your toss and timing are dialed in.

• Groundies: You should feel like you’re using easy power not forcing the shot.

• Slices and Volleys: Good shots will feel crisp and balanced—not heavy or jarring.

Wrap: Tune Into the Game

Tennis isn’t just about hitting balls—it’s about reading, responding, and adjusting in real time. When you start using your eyes, ears, and hands as your guide, you stop guessing and start noticing. Every shot becomes a small lesson. The court becomes less chaotic, and your mind gets calmer because you’re in tune with what’s actually happening.

Don’t wait until match day to use your senses—train with them. Build that feedback loop into your regular practice. You’ll play smarter, adapt faster, and feel more in control. That’s not just good tennis. That’s progress.